Monday, December 29, 2008

Ode to Canada

Dear Canada,

I first started seeing headlines about your government having problems a few weeks ago. I naturally assumed that the news was broken. You are Canada, my strong, friendly neighbor to the North where things always seems wonderful; very very cold, but wonderful. I have been offering to be the princess of your country for years now & I promise to never suspend parliament just because they think I should be fired. (Ok, so I don't have a huge grasp of Canadian politics, but it's not my fault that it's always in the back of the newspaper.) Please see my enclosed resume.

1984-1992 Kicked every boy that I saw & then said "Ha ha you can't kick me back I'm a girl." This demonstrates that I'm not afraid to take a tough line & stand up for what I believe in which is kicking people.

1991-1992 Had a crazy crush on Alex Trebek because I thought he was the smartest man in the entire world.

199something-Present Knows every single Alanis Morissette lyric.

1998: Pasted a picture of an adorable Hockey player in my locker along with his bio that said he was from Nova Scotia. Nova Scotia boy is still a legend to this day.


  • I know the first two words of the Canadian national anthem.
  • Funnier than Caroline Rhea.


A friend once said that I'm the only person she's ever met that acts like Anne of Green Gables.


Alyssa Goodnight said...

I've gotta admit, I'm even more impressed with you now that I know you've got the gumption to behave like Anne.

Packsaddle said...

In my opinion, anyone who starts a blog post with "Dear Canada" is certainly capable of something special.

You have my vote!

JenKneeBee said...

If I lived in Canada, I would totally want you to come and take over. It's kind of a mess up there.

Allie said...

I would hire you.
I love the Anne of Green Gables recommendation.

supertiff said...

you just made me laugh so hard, i nearly peed my pants.
so, thanks.

Stacy said...

I'm so jealous of your resume!

a little bird said...


you haven't gotten the princess of canada position because it's filled - by me.

I am a canuck through and through.

happy 2009 my funny friend!!

Britt said...

Hello! I'm Britt - sent over via a link from Robin at little bird. Thought I'd introduce myself before I creep on your blog!

Come on up to the great white north (except I'm in vancouver and it's more the great rainy north..) - we can use all the princesses we can get!

Barrie said...

As a Canadian, I love this post. And you are so Anne of Green Gables!

lazy Mom said...

I have some friends who are Canadian and boy would find this funny. They are a little differnt those Canadians. I laugh at then (I mean with them) all the time. Keep up the great blog. I just started so I'm learning from those around here.