Things I Will Beat

There are two things in my life I have always chosen incorrectly: men and table lamps. I'm ok with the former because I'm supposed to have a high failure percentage at dating. Also I found out this week that I cannot fix a vacuum no matter how much I think I can.

Over the years I've had lamps with feather shades and horrible craft project painted shades. That didn't deter me though, I also tried gluing artificial flowers all over a lampshade. It worked, it just didn't look good. I've had that weird ufo lamp shade on plain silver base that everyone gets from IKEA. I've had plain crystal bases that just bored me. I once had a lamp named "lampy", which was a 3 foot tall crystal lamp with homemade gray drum shade that caused such serious roommate contention that it was never put to use. Lampy was ahead of his/her time, as now it would cost $300 anywhere. I miss lampy. I'm looking for a new reading lamp for my bedside table. I've determined from my past failures that it needs to be pretty tall and have a white shade so it's functional for reading, even though I hate white lamp shades.

I think I end up getting ugly lamps just because I want something different and awesome and it works in the rest of my house but somehow just always fails in the lamp department. I find myself hauling around a lot of lamp emotional baggage, like I always know I'm making the wrong choice which is why I haven't had a reading lamp in umm 3 years. Here were a few of the contenders (well the few basic ideas some of them were too expensive). I ended up buying the Eiffel tower one. I plan on having this conversation at least 3 times next week "No I'm not married. Why? Oh I just haven't found the right guy. Getting married is hard. I did however finally buy an acceptable table lamp...go me!"