Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Sarakastic's Headlines Save the World

Warning: Severe sarcasm ahead. Not for the faint of heart.

I am so sick of seeing articles talking about whether Juno & the Jamie Lynn Spears cover are glamorizing teenage pregnancy. The only thing that Juno made me want to do is buy a hamburger phone & not watch Juno again because it just wasn't a funny movie. So in the spirit of diplomacy I have decided to fix this problem. Here are some headlines I've rewritten.

The real headline: Alli Sims: Jamie Lynn Spears "Going to Have Fun" With Maddie.

My headline: Jamie Lynne Spears "Going to have Fun with Maddie" but you won't have a nanny, money or sleep pretty much ever again.

The Real Headline: '24' Star's Biological Clock Stops Ticking

My Headline
: This story used to have the worst headline ever. I fixed it.

Instead of any headline that says star gives birth, it should say "Human being tears itself from inside of so & so's body"

Hello drop in teenage pregnancy rate.


Stacy said...

You didn't like Juno? I had no idea that was possible!

Alyssa Goodnight said...

After reading these, I can't imagine how I survived pregnancy and the early years... Yikes!

I havne't actually seen Juno.

a little bird said...

haha, love it.

but lets be serious now,

Warning: Severe sarcasm ahead. Not for the faint of heart.

necessary? I think not. your blog is always a riot : )

ellesappelle said...

That last one just might work!

~Virginia~ said...

i've always been partial to "spew forth from loins".

Trish Ryan said...

THAT is the solution to teen pregnancy we've been looking for! You are a woman of much wisdom and many talents...