Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Sarakastic's Headlines Save the World

Warning: Severe sarcasm ahead. Not for the faint of heart.

I am so sick of seeing articles talking about whether Juno & the Jamie Lynn Spears cover are glamorizing teenage pregnancy. The only thing that Juno made me want to do is buy a hamburger phone & not watch Juno again because it just wasn't a funny movie. So in the spirit of diplomacy I have decided to fix this problem. Here are some headlines I've rewritten.

The real headline: Alli Sims: Jamie Lynn Spears "Going to Have Fun" With Maddie.

My headline: Jamie Lynne Spears "Going to have Fun with Maddie" but you won't have a nanny, money or sleep pretty much ever again.

The Real Headline: '24' Star's Biological Clock Stops Ticking

My Headline
: This story used to have the worst headline ever. I fixed it.

Instead of any headline that says star gives birth, it should say "Human being tears itself from inside of so & so's body"

Hello drop in teenage pregnancy rate.

6 comments:

Stacy said...

You didn't like Juno? I had no idea that was possible!

Alyssa Goodnight said...

After reading these, I can't imagine how I survived pregnancy and the early years... Yikes!

I havne't actually seen Juno.

robin ann mcintosh said...

haha, love it.

but lets be serious now,

Warning: Severe sarcasm ahead. Not for the faint of heart.

necessary? I think not. your blog is always a riot : )

Allie said...

That last one just might work!

Unknown said...

i've always been partial to "spew forth from loins".

Trish Ryan said...

THAT is the solution to teen pregnancy we've been looking for! You are a woman of much wisdom and many talents...