Sunday, August 02, 2009

Dating a Ninja

I haven't written much about boys or dating lately, mostly because I haven't been dating & don't wanna. I'm trying to keep my eyes on the ultimate prize by envisioning what it would actually be like to date a ninja.

Scene: Outside a fancy restaurant where they serve seventeen kinds of cheesy bread on really pretty plates. Said restaurant does not exist and there is only one kind of cheesy bread which is bread with cheese on it, but this is my dream world.

Me: Kick the door open.
Ninja: Not again, I'll just open it for you.
Me: I can open the door myself. Kick it in, it's just a push door, you won't hurt it. You are a ninja. Ninjas are awesome. Be awesome.
Ninja: I'm not that kind of ninja.
Me: I'm not going in until you do.
Ninja: That's not what ninjas do. We have great power under greater control. Being a ninja is a defensive not an offensive position. In my youth I used my powers for evil but now I am in harmony with my true ninja nature.
Me: You disappoint me.


Allie said...

Noooooo! Even a ninja is disappointing!

Britt said...

In residence, we had a pirates vs ninja's competition. The pirates won - they have much less morals than ninjas do. Maybe you should find a pirate (a la Johnny Depp) I'm sure he'd kick the door in for you :)

LEstes65 said...

You have very high standards for your ninja. But I have hope he will appear. And he will have a single, older brother who has always wanted children but couldn't have any of his own. And he will want to move to Texas. Oh yes. I have hope.

Jennie said...

I agree with Britt... go for a pirate. He'd kick the door down for you :)

Alyssa Goodnight said...

I suppose even a Jedi would disappoint...

My seven-year-old is not yet a ninja (although his current life plan is to become one), but he'd totally side with you on this one.

Stacy said...

I hope you break up with him. After dessert, of course.

Anna said...

Even Ninja boys end up disappointing you.