Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Be Thankful You Aren't at My Apartment

As the season of gratitude nears you should all be thankful that you aren't coming over to my house for Thanksgiving dinner. This is unless you are in fact coming over to my house for Thanksgiving dinner in which case I'd highly recommend that you cancel and quickly. Trust me, if I wasn't me I would cancel on me.

I don't know exactly how I made squash look/smell and taste like sulfur but I did. I wasn't trying to, just some chemistry or science happened while I wasn't looking. While I was feeding it to the garbage disposal it took on such a pungent smell that I had to distract myself so I wouldn't' get sick. This was the line that my thoughts took:

"Just don't think about it pretend you are in Hawaii"

"If this is what Hawaii is like which I doubt then I hate Hawaii"

"Ok then think about something that is almost as bad but at least you can handle it"

"Just pretend it's a dirty diaper. Dirty diaper. Dirty diapers are gross but its better than this."

6 comments:

Allie said...

Have you considered chemistry as a career?

Stacy said...

Maybe the squash was some mad scientist's farming experiment, so you aren't to blame at all!

heidikins said...

Oh dear.

xox

rubytuesdays said...

oh dear god what could be worse than a dirty diaper????

Alyssa Goodnight said...

I don't know...some dirty diapers are totally outrageouly disgusting and it's all you can do to just wrap them up and treat them like the biohazards they are.

LEstes65 said...

I'm wondering if you just tossed some cure for cancer down the drain!