Dear Shirts,

I'm not buying any more of you until you shape up. It's bad enough that everything has an elasticized peasant bottom or drop waist. Yippee, finally women everywhere can look more like Santa.

My big problem is with the arms. I don't know exactly what a dolman sleeve is but I do know that it probably means "What happens when every fashion designer in America accidentally turns in drawings from their 5 year old." That is exactly how a kid draws a shirt, with no armpits. For years, I've had to worry that there's a gap between low rise jeans and tee shirts. Then it was the scoop necks that could possibly be low on top. I expect this but now I also have to worry about lifting my arm at all because the sleeves are wide enough to see through to everything else. I have never heard a woman say "Geeze I wish my upper arms and chest were more connect-y".

Sincerely,

Sarakastic